12/21/10
I have to get out of here. Somehow. I’m so tired of this place. The Philadelphia way of life is not for me.
A few days ago I made the profound error of looking at my home town on Google maps. It’s changed a lot. The woods are gone, replaced by multi-million dollar mansions. When I was growing up, it was a small and affluent quiet town. Now it’s all about prestige. The median home price is in the 700K range. Obviously out of my league.
Not that I would necessarily want to live in my hometown again. It’s only 45 minutes outside of Manhattan but the nearest highway is at least ten minutes away. That’s no good unless I’m living in a log cabin on 60 acres. Until that dream materializes, I want to be relatively close to convenient transportation.
Of course I miss NYC more than anything. There, I truly felt at home. From the first time I ventured into the West Village when I was 13, I knew I belonged there. The city felt alive and vibrant and full of hope. If NYC is for you, it grabs you right away. And it never lets you go. Sometimes I ache for it. Is it silly to ache for a place? Maybe. I don’t care.
I guess what I really miss, when it comes right down to it, is not feeling out of place. I don’t belong in Philadelphia. Plain and simple. I don’t dress or look or act like most people I encounter here. Despite all my rants, I’ve met some very friendly people in Philadelphia. But the overall attitude of this city is plain negative. And since I’ve moved here, I’ve become more negative myself.
I have to get out before Philadelphia pollutes me. Before I become one of them.
By them, I mean the people who walk around with a chip on their shoulder, just waiting for someone to knock it off, be it by something real or imaginary. The people who make driving here so dangerous. The people who don’t care about themselves, their surroundings, or other people.
My deepest apologies to all the good people of Philadelphia, but in my experience, there’s way too many of these rotten apples and they spoil your city. I can’t stand it here.
This blog was not intended to add to the negativity of this city. When I started it I had no thoughts of visitors to the site. This is my own little place to vent about what I experience here. I’m surprised by the amount of hits this site gets and by how many people agree with my feelings.
So what to do?
Moving expenses: First month rent, 2 months security deposit, moving truck, utility expenses……around 4K.
Every time I manage to save money, something breaks and I have to spend it. I’ve made some bad choices that have left me with no savings, no retirement fund, nothing. And no health care to boot, yippee! So I’m stuck here and can’t blame anyone or anything but myself. Wait I’ve had some rotten luck and have been betrayed by people close to me. Can I put a little blame on that? No, I chose to move here, lured in by the low rents. Lesson learned.
I have to find a way to get out of here.